Kids Say the Darndest Things.....

I've been collecting this tiny list since last Halloween when I realized I wasn't going to remember all these funny things my kids have said...again I've lost too many of these... I just can't seem to write them down!

Aidan: "It's nightmare on Elmo street!" Aidan, dressed up as Jason, is posing for a Halloween picture with Owen, dressed up as Elmo.
Owen: Mom says "I'll be right back, I'm going to the bathroom." Owen answers "Ok, don't fall in! I will miss you!"
Owen:  I love it when the kids show their budding language skills. Opposites is one of my particular favorites. I remember Aidan saying "But Mom, I want you to have a warm!" when I told him I had a cold and couldn't play with him.  I think he must have been 2 or three. Owen just made me think of this. Mom says "It's time for some quiet time Owen." Owen matter-of-factly says, "I think I will just have some loud time."
Owen:  We are reading a bedtime story and there is a picture of a cow with a bright pink udder.  Owen exclaims "Look mom, the pig crawled up the cow's butt!"  I laughed so hard I was about to cry.  I explained that the picture was actually showing the cow's udder.  Also, explaining where the cow's milk comes from.  The rest of the night he couldn't quit talking about the cow's "butt"-er.
Owen:  We are in the back seat for the car and he says something that I am not sure should be coming out of his mouth so I ask "Where did you learn that?" His answer, "I learned it in my own head!"  Of course!

Update:

Aidan came up with this funny script to act out with a couple of friends for his school's upcoming talent show.  Aidan came up with all the funny concepts and he got a little help from mom and dad to refine the script.  He had callbacks last night and he is excited that he made the cut.  Here is his skit:

Aidan- Good afternoon and thanks for joining us, I’m Aidan Scott

Austin- And I’m Austin and you are watching the “Buckner Rap”....In Headlines today, there has been an outbreak of cooties in the fourth grade.  The school nurse says that while no long term harm is caused by the cootie virus, cooties are highly contagious and can cause mild embarrassment until they are passed to someone else. The Good news though is that even though it’s late in the season, it’s not too late to get your cootie vaccine!.........Aidan

Aidan-  In an interesting 2012 study, students who eat school lunches on a regular basis are more likely to be Justin Bieber fans.  Researchers say the findings are unclear but it most likely has something to do with their lack of taste!............Well, we finally know why so many students ate their homework and ended up in the nurses office last week.  This mysterious homework eating phenomenon was started when their teacher gave out the homework assignments and said “it is a piece of cake!”.................

Austin-  As Buckner students, what is our favorite thing about school but we just cant seem to get as often as we want?.......That’s right.  Recess!  Its either too hot, too cold, too windy, or too wet.  To find out more on this recess mess, we go to our playground correspondent Alex Byington on the scene.

Alex- Thanks guys....(indicating the nice weather) well we have a beautiful day here on the Buckner playground.  Temperatures are in the mid 80’s with very little wind.  The sun is out and there is no chance of rain.

Austin- Well thats great news for those kids desperately wanting to get some playground time.

Alex- Not so fast Austin, I am told by school officials that because it rained a few weeks ago that there is a slight chance we could get our shoes wet....so looks like we will have to wait a little while longer.............

Aidan- Last week school officials voted to stop allowing busses to drive by gas stations.  We interviewed Ms. Filsram about this story and she said, and I quote  “The safety of our students is our top priority and under no circumstances will we allow our Bus Drivers to pass gas.”...................

Austin- I am told we have breaking news on the playground.  We are learning that it might actually be dry enough for recess.  For more information we go back to our playground correspondent Alex Byington.

Alex- Thats right Austin.  School staff has reversed their decision regarding not letting students go outside because of potential wet sneakers!......(holding ear like he is being told updates) Hold on a minute, hold on....I’m being told that there are too many clouds in the sky for us to have fun.  School rules say kids can only go out for recess if there are three clouds or less.  Unfortunately we are at four clouds!...... Well we will take a break and be back in a few minutes.

Aidan- When we return ... the game of tag...is it exercise or just an excuse to push people?  And why can it be played in P.E but not on recess.  Also, could this be where all the cases of cooties started....we will find out when we return.